DR. MAC Q & A

Submit your question to Dr. Mac to ggiesen@greggiesenassociates.com.

Dear Dr. Mac:

I was recently laid off of my job of 6-years and my self-confidence has taken a beating. How can I avoid a similar situation in the future?

-Need a Job

Dear Need a Job,

Let's address the self-confidence issue first. It appears to me that you might be over-identifying with your work, particularly you last job. I only mention this because you are attributing your lack of self-confidence with being laid off. Yes, you got laid off, but your self-confidence doesn't have to suffer as a result.

Self-confidence is having confidence in oneself. It is not based on others' opinions or external factors that happen to impact us. In your case, getting laid off is an external factor that certainly is testing your self-confidence but by no means is it determining it. You are the only one who can take your self-confidence away, not anybody else. Therefore, instead of seeing this lay off as a cause-and-effect with your self-confidence; see it instead as an opportunity to demonstrate your self-confidence. Make sense?

Now let's talk a little about how to avoid, or at least be better prepared, for the possibility of lay offs in the future. Here are some strategies that have been shared with me in the past:

1. Cultivate work relationships, even if it means playing in the annual golf tournament that you hate or attending those boring birthday parties. People want to be around people who make them feel comfortable. If it's a close call on who to keep and who to let go, you and your anti-team-mentality are going to lose.
2. Stay current in your field. Take a seminar. Write an article for a trade journal or get certified on a new piece of software. Make yourself valuable
3. Toot your own horn. Remind your boss just how much you contribute to the bottom line. Volunteer to take on extra projects. Bring in new customers or find ways to cut costs. It doesn't matter how great a job you do, if no one realizes you do it.
4. Learn to read the handwriting on the wall. Get to know people in different departments throughout your company. The sales and service staffs always know before anyone else how the company is doing.
5. Keep your resume updated. If you haven't looked at your resume in over a year, drag it out and review it. Make sure you've included your latest work accomplishments, awards, projects and promotions.
6. Stay current on the latest news about your company and in your field. Read the business sections in the newspaper. Look at trade journals. Read your company's annual report. Pay particular attention to stories that might indicate how the market is doing in related areas.
7. If you think the company might be considering layoffs, get busy finding yourself a new job and then volunteer to leave. If you're the first one out the door, you might be able to negotiate a substantial severance package. Later people won't be so lucky.
8. Get rid of all personal information on your work computer. Keep copies of performance evaluations, certifications, letters of appreciation, etc, at home. Maintain a current list of networking contacts, e-mail addresses and other useful information (including your current resume) on your home computer as well. If you get laid off, chances are you won't be allowed to even log into your computer, let alone be allowed to download anything. That's why it is a good idea to plan ahead.

Hope that helps a little.

-Dr. Mac

Dear Dr. Mac:

I was promoted over my peers two years ago and there are a couple of individuals that still are hurt and have a hard time working for me. They do not admit it to me but have to other managers. What can I do?

-Not My Fault Fran

Dear Not My Fault Fran:

Let me ask you a question. Is job performance a factor here? If it is, then your conversation with each of these two individuals needs to focus on what's not happening regarding their job performance and what needs to happen. The fact that one or both employees might still have hurt feelings is secondary at this point. Keep in mind that a negative attitude or disruptive communication (i.e., inappropriately talking about others behind their backs) is considered a performance issue in my book.

If job performance is not an issue, then you have to ask yourself how much of your time and energy is worth spending on this? In most cases, I'd tell you to let it go and direct your energy towards more important things. However, if these are important relationships to you and you want to address your concerns, then by all means do so. Just remember these important steps: First, meet individually with each employee. Share your observations that have led you to believe that they are not supporting you as their supervisor. Use specific examples if you can, without adding any hearsay information that others have brought to you. Ask them for their perspective. If one or both happens to come clean with their concerns, then brainstorm ways to work together in order to create a win-win working relationship.

If, on the other hand, one or both should continue to deny it, then shift gears and ask them for feedback and/or suggestions on how you could best support them in their jobs. If you can get at least one "doable" suggestion from each of them, you will have made tremendous progress. The key is to make sure that you follow through with whatever it is that you agreed to do. That simple gesture will go a long way in turning these relationships around.

-Dr. Mac

Dear Dr. Mac:

I have a supervisor who is very controlling. She has learned this behavior in the last few years from her manager. Recently, I found out that her manager is leaving. Given that, how can I work with or convince my supervisor to change her management style?

-Had About Enough

Dear Had About Enough:

I'm glad to see that you want to take action in order to better a situation that needs correcting. My only regret is that you waited so long to do so. The fact that your supervisor's manager has a controlling management style is really irrelevant. Yes, your supervisor could have been influenced by this person, but the focus here needs to be about your working relationship with your supervisor. Assessing why this happened or who influenced who doesn't help us solve the problem.

Before you initiate a meeting to talk with your supervisor, it is important to develop some clarity for yourself on what outcomes you are looking for from this upcoming conversation. In addition, be prepared to identify the specific behavior that has become problematic for you and share with her how that behavior has impacted your work, not to mention your morale. Then, be sure to suggest an alternative behavior that she could use with you that would definitely produce a greater sense of empowerment for you. And lastly, make sure she understands how making this collaborative change for you would ultimately benefit not only her, but the department as well.

Just remember that this conversation is not about what's wrong with your supervisor; rather its' about what you need differently from her in order to be more effective in your job.

-Dr. Mac

Dear Dr. Mac:

I have an employee with a young child. Her work performance has been satisfactory but not at the level prior to child birth (given sick child issues, etc.). How do I challenge her and reward her for what she is doing while encouraging her to reach for her previous level of performance again?

-Trying to be Sensitive

Dear Trying to be Sensitive:

The fact that your employee now has a child may or may not be contributing to her recent job performance decline. I would not make that assumption given that there are a multitude of factors that could impact one's motivation level and job performance. You are better off just sticking to the performance measures that are not being met.

Meet with this employee in a place where you can have a private and uninterrupted conversation (preferable over a cup of coffee somewhere away from the office, if possible).

Make the conversation upbeat by acknowledging her for the work she has done and continues to do for the company. Be specific and use examples if possible-it just makes for better feedback.

Once you've done that, tell her that you've noticed a recent drop in her performance levels. Ask if everything is okay. See if there is anything she needs from you that could help support her in getting her performance back on track. Such an approach demonstrates a compassion for the individual while reinforcing the need to maintain a particular performance standard. It also provides you with feedback that may help in determining how best to coach this employee.

When you've come to an agreed upon strategy for moving forward, thank the employee again for meeting with you and set a time to check-in with each other before leaving.

-Dr. Mac